I think patrick jane is rj as he is never killed by any of his accomplices. I think he already killed rj but uses his names to do justice and kill everyone who is evil and thus everyone who gets close to jane personal life gets killed as he doesn't want anyone to look up his past history before joining CBI.Never dates anyone and there is no love life indicated by the writer for jane, how many Tv series has a lead with out a personal life or even one GF.