Theories of Hll (89)

Sure does seem hard to believe that Heller is going to deliver much at this point.  I wouldn't say all hope is gone, but many episodes have seemed to go by completely wasted:  episodes 9-16 have established what...?  

1.  Jane's "new life" amounts to...a new shirt and teacup, and not one word about what he did the previous 10 years? 

2.  Haibach [a low life pedophile] was really...a mastermind plotter/hacker/psychokiller with his hillbilly sister?   And it is truly sad that we were given more information [albeit improbable information] about Haibach than we ever got about RJ....

3.  Grigsby...[who once split to keep their jobs]  are happy to leave police work behind?

4.  Lisbon...[who has never had a boyfriend in 10 years] suddenly has a boyfriend after one episode

BUT I WILL SAY THIS -- there has been a hint of "Red" in almost every episode since Red John, the most noticeable in "Violets" -- in fact, if you really look, ALMOST EVERY SCENE has a noticeable red in it, the most memorable being:

LISBON in red PJs in a red bed with a red painting behind her [while talking to Marcus Pike AKA "red herring"]

Of course, I'd love to say that this is a hint to something deeper, something yet to come, something about RJ but we should all have learned by now, that in The Mentalist, these kinds of things are useless to wonder.   Heller caters to the masses, and apparently you can put lipstick on a pig [so long as it's red!]

Most likely, this red everywhere [besides being a cruel tease], is probably to show that Lisbon is experiencing attraction, passion and possibly love [ruled by red] since the show is now about "hopeful new beginnings"

I would have detailed the things I've noticed 9-16, but guessing and listing clues hasn't paid off well.

Perhaps it wiser to wait and see what happens.  If anything does happen [though I think highly doubtful], then and only then would it be worth while to go back and look at any clues leading up to that point.

I'd love to see old familiar faces come back [Stiles, Haffner...ANYBODY], but there, too, I have a sinking feeling that it will be for a lesser and/or demeaning purpose then what we'd be hoping for -- based on what they did with Ardiles, LaRoche and Haibach [which was truly awful]

So, I've left a little room for a bit of hope but mostly I'm not expecting much.

Damn Heller -- he is fucking with us or what?  To go and name a new character MARCUS PIKE  -- really?  At this point?  

Because if he has no intention on fixing this McRJ crap, he should have named Lisbon's boyfriend something more generic, like Dan Brown, okay? 

NOT....He Is MAR[cus]!

Marcus: means Mars, war, red and hammer
Pike:  is a place, a fish and a weapon

"THE FLAPPIST"
When Pigeon Jane goes on national TV to mock Rooster John as an "ugly, tormented little Dodo," Pigeon Jane comes home to find that Rooster John has plucked his family and left the Sad Bird face on the wall.  So, Pigeon Jane devotes his life to finding Rooster John, working for the California Bird Investigations alongside: 

Teresa Lisbird, Kimball Chickadee, Wayne Robin, Grace Van Parakeet and Director, Gale Birdtrap

SEASON SIX:  As the hunt for Rooster John intensifies, Pigeon Jane narrows the suspects down to LIST OF 7.  They are:

Bret Starling, Ray Hummingbird, Bob Kirkrane, Reede Sparrow, Brett Partridge, Sheriff Mockingbird and Gale Birdtrap


SEASON SIX EPISODES:



Episode One  -- "THE PIGEON THAT SAVED LISBIRD"  --  When Partridge is "braced" by Rooster's claw, Lisbird runs to help but winds up a sitting duck herself until a pigeon flaps his wings at Rooster John, causing him to fly the coup.  Before Partridge dies, he utters "Raven Raven" to Lisbird, something Rooster John had said to Pigeon Jane once -- linked to the famous poem by Edgar Allen Poe.



Episode Two --   "THAT'S NOT TURKEY FOR DINNER"   --- When Pigeon Jane pays a visit to his former doctor, Sophie Mallard, he finds her goose is cooked in the oven, knowing it was the work of Rooster John when he sees the Sad Bird Face on the refrigerator.  Turns out, Rooster John had been visiting Mallard, disguised as "Blue Jay" to get info on Pigeon Jane.  However, Rooster John is getting sloppy doesn't know is that he left a bird dropping himself.



Episode Three -- "BIRD'S EYE VIEW" -- When Pigeon Jane investigates a murder by a duck pond in Napa -- Mockingbird territory, the cocksure Mockingbird saves Jane from falling off a church roof -- but when an unknown pigeon flies into the bell tower, Mockingbird's feathers get ruffled.  Lovebirds Wayne Robin and Grace Van Parakeet finally wed.
  


Episode Four --  "KILL TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE" --  Homing Pigeon Security expert Kirkrane kidnaps Pigeon Jane, along with known chick stealer Hawkbach, and it is discovered that Kirkrane been on the hunt for Rooster John, too.  Jane is rescued thanks to former Bird Investigating Director, Madeleine Hawktower, and Kirkrane is arrested.  Reede Sparrow, worried Kirkrane will be a stool pigeon, kills him for knowing about "Raven, Raven." 



Episode Five --  "A LITTLE BIRD TOLD ME" --  Pigeon Jane tells Lisbird that Kira Titmouse told him that Rooster John has a 3 egg tattoo on his left wing.



Episode Six --   "BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER" -- with the 3 egg tattoo clue, Pigeon Jane gathers up the remaining 5 suspects : Starling, Hummingbird, Birdtrap, Sparrow and Mockingbird to his seaside coop to reveal that Mockingbird, Sparrow and Birdtrap all have the 3 egg tattoo.  When Lisbird arrives, a blast sends her flying back.



Episode Seven --  "AS THE CROW FLIES"  -- It is revealed that Starling, Hummingbird and Mockingbird are all killed in the blast, but Pigeon Jane, Reede Sparrow and Birdtrap lived.  Van Parakeet and Robin succeed in catching Sparrow and we finally learn about the significance of Raven, Raven: it's the password for the "Poe Society," a corrupt group that's for the birds.   Also, Birdtrap, accused of being Rooster John, goes on the fly with Oscar Cuckoo.  Subsequently, California Bird Investigations is shut down by Federal Bird Investigations boss, Dennis Albatross.



Episode Eight --  "CHOKING THE CHICKEN -- otherwise known as the long anticipated ROOSTER JOHN REVEAL -- Pigeon Jane meets Birdtrap and Oscar Cuckoobird in a church, but Sheriff Mockingbird shows up, telling Cuckoobird to shoot Birdtrap because Birdtrap tried to be a crow, but is really an emu.   As Mockingbird feigns a high bird chirp, claiming to be Rooster John -- Pigeon Jane throws a pigeon at him -- having remembered how Mockingbird's feathers got ruffled the last time a pigeon got near his beak.  



A chase ensues with Rooster John running like a chicken with it's head cut off, and finally he drops near a duck pond where Pigeon Jane wrings Rooster John's chicken neck, choking him to death.


Episode Nine -- "MY BIRD HEAVEN"  --  2 years later and Pigeon Jane has flown south.  He meets Kim Falcon and they
become like night owls, staying out all night, singing like canaries and doing the chicken dance -- until Federal Bird Investigations Agent Albatross shows up to offer Jane a deal he cannot turn his beak up at.  However, Pigeon Jane writes his terms in his chicken scratch on a napkin stating that he will only go if they agree to let him sit in the catbird's seat.


Episode Ten --  "THE PIGEON TOE"  --  Jane  flies back to Texas to join the Federal Bird Investigations but gives them the bird when Agent Albatross won't honor his chicken scratch.  He also learns that Kim Falcon, the chick he danced the dirty bird with, is really a Federal Bird Agent.  And when Jane won't submit to her Agent Falcon's talons, she gets madder than a wet hen, realizing that she in fact, is under Jane's pigeon's toe whether she likes it or not.  Finally, they call Lisbird in to handle Pigeon Jane, and she gives him a pair of really good socks.

Episode Eleven -- "WHITE BIRD LINES"  -- When Pigeon Jane goes on a date with Brianna Budgie, knowing that while the Rooster crows, it's the hen that delivers, and getting closer to her, he realizes she's really a snow bird struttin' a lot of bad eggs.


Episode Twelve -- "GOLDEN BEAKS" -- While Jane hatches an idea about an egg that's been scrambled, Osprey Ardiles clucks to Lisbird that he feels he's being watched over the pigeon wire, but he keeps laying an egg when it comes to doing anything about it.  And before Lisbird can help him, he is pecked out faster than a chicken on a Junebug.



Episode Thirteen -- "BLACK HENHOUSE" -- Pigeon Jane rules the roost in a henhouse commune.  Meanwhile, Van Parakeet and Robin go visit former Bird Investigator Director J.J. LaRoundTail but he doesn't want to stick his neck out. Later on, LaRoundTail later walks right into a dark henhouse like a dumb cluck because it's really a booby trap that fowls him up for good.



Episode Fourteen -- "FIFTY SHADES OF GREY CHICKEN" -- The FBI team investigates a fracking on land where chickens used to roam.  Van Parakeet and Robin are almost killed when a fox enters their henhouse, and they fly south to investigate with Lisbird and Pigeon but Van Parakeet is abutted and put in a bird cage.



Episode Fifteen -- "WHITE AS A SWAN DIVE" -- Hawkback is back and tired of being henpecked by those FBI/CBI people but Pigeon Jane knows Hawkback's story isn't all it's cracked up to be.  Turns out, Van Parakeet's near the cabin that Hawkback's sister scratches out a living at.  But leave it to Pigeon Jane to devise a plan, making think Hawkback think he's abducting both him and Robin so Hawkback will take them where Van Parakeet is tied up like a turkey.  Hawkback tries to clip Pigeon Jane's wing but Robin saves the day and the yolks on Hawkback. 

Turns out Van Parakeet and Robin are good eggs after all, and they leave for good, content to just feather their nest from now on!

Now we await the remaining episodes:
"Bird-Foot Violet"
"Silver Wings of Time"
"Forest Green Ducks"
'Brown Eyed Barn Owl"
"Il Toucan Bianco"
"Black Herons" -- AND FINALLY, the just announced FINALE, "BLUE BIRD" 


I believe that in "BLUE BIRD" -- we will finally learn the TRUE IDENTITY of ROOSTER JOHN when PIGEON JANE comes beak to beak with BLUE BIRD, going back to the abandoned CBI building and finding Blue Bird's nest, along with Edgar Allen Poe books, cowboy boots, a teapot and CBI Ron clucking around like a chicken.

Blue Bird traps Pigeon Jane and tells him the story of how she has always sought revenge for the chopping down of the tree her Blue Bird family was in, which killed everyone in the nest --- when they cleared the land to build the new California Bird Investigations headquarters.  That is why she orchestrated the closing down of the CBI -- to reclaim her ancestral home.  

She tells Jane how she took refuge after losing her home and family by joining Visualize and Bret Starling, who encouraged her to take flight to Napa, where she built a new nest above the Napa Police Station, planning her revenge, and developing a male alter ego ROOSTER JOHN.  Blue Bird went on to start her own law enforcement mafia, The Poe Association, that she ran from her nest, controlling the lives of thousands with just two words: Raven, Raven

But her true mission was hypnotizing vultures with her birdsong, getting them to do her dirty bird work, finally honing in on one particular bird brain, Napa Sheriff Thomas Mockingbird -- and using him as a sitting duck to exact revenge on the CBI and Pigeon Jane, finally letting him roast for being Rooster John.

Blue Birds relishes her success in fooling everyone, proclaiming that she is the "Queen of Fowl," strutting her stuff as she chirps to Pigeon Jane that she's going to feed him to a vulture like a worm -- but just then, Lisbird breaks in, arresting Blue Bird and saving Jane and CBI Ron who go home with Lisbird where Jane makes everyone the best scrambled eggs.

All this time, how did I not see?  Of course, the sad bird smiley face with a cowlick is really the face of THE BLUE BIRD!  
http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-103772471/stock-vector-sad-bird.html

Dorothy and Scarecrow have gone off somewhere over the rainbow...because "there's no place like home".....


So, I'm going back to theorizing about who, other than McRJ, could also be RJ related  [disclaimer:  I'm aware that I might be wrong but I really don't care.  I like to theorize, it's fun].  So, I'd like to point out, working within reasonable parameters:


What we've been SHOWN vs. what we've been TOLD:  ["Believe only half of what you see and nothing that you hear.”  Edgar Allen Poe [and Ben Franklin, too]


1. SHOWN that Smith had 3 Dot Tattoo, was BA and is now in jail

2. SHOWN that Bertram had 3 Dot Tattoo, was BA and is now dead

3. SHOWN that B. Kirkland was hunting RJ and is now dead [unless it's M. Kirkland instead]; TOLD his twin is dead

4. SHOWN that McRJ had 3 Dot Tattoo, was in BA , can feign a high pitched voice, fears pigeons and is now dead; TOLD he's RJ.  Maybe McRJ is the real McCoy, but it was only implied, if you count a fake voice as proof.  McRJ only ever admitted to being the head of BA [and we were SHOWN proof of that]

5. SHOWN Partridge bloodied, then only TOLD he died; SHOWN a body at morgue but only TOLD it was Partridge; never saw face.  Also, TOLD he was BA.

6.  TOLD Stiles is dead

7.  TOLD Haffner is dead


Yes, this could be the careless breadcrumbs of a harried writer who is onto new horizons and "doesn't care" anymore but let's just say Heller cares for the sake of this argument:  Basically, all that is highlighted under TOLD should be suspicious with Stiles & Haffner in the lead:  we were shown absolutely nothing about those two.


More random thoughts:


1.  SMITH was a late arriving character and a bull in a china shop, in other words, lacking history, as well as finesse:  but I loved the scene of his capturing, and I hope to never see him again!  


2.  BERTRAM really was smart but dumb and didn't know anything about RJ.  He was also SURPRISINGLY violent.  Wow, was anyone else shocked when he killed that bartender so ruthlessly?  I almost got sick.  You think you know someone?!…LOL


3.  Was B. KIRKLAND actually B. KIRKLAND?  Or did M. KIRKLAND assume brothers identity, or vice versa?  In either case, the twin scenario and forest barn are intriguing possibilities, and a Kirkland twin showing up would be fun [unlike Haibach showing up].  


4.  McRJ…?!  If episode 22 is nothing more than Jane kissing Lisbon and Fischer honing her wand skills, then it was fun and it will be over.


5.  PARTRIDGE!  IF he is alive, I tend to think he's hiding out similar to Hightower, and he's a helper.  I think he'd love nothing more than to be a Jr. Patrick Jane.  I never liked Partridge for RJ because of the obviousness but I'd welcome it if it came with a clever twist. [Anything has to be better than what we've gotten so far!]  


6.  If JANE were RJ, and when I say that, I do not mean that Jane is doing the killing, I mean that Jane gets others to do it by hypnotizing them -- how ironic would it be that Jane admonishes Partridge for looking up to RJ, if in fact Jane is RJ!  All this time we're watching Jane treat Partridge as if he were the person that --  he really is.  [hello…PROJECTION!]  Jane publicly scolding Partridge for openly liking what he himself is secretly supplying?  -- Unlikely, I know, but I think that could have worked brilliantly.  Partridge as ghoulish hero LOL


7. STILES I love for RJ papa, friend, accomplice or even as RJ mastermind himself. 


8.  HAFFNER could be Stiles' son, I think, and with that said RJ!  I did not previously like Haffner for RJ because of the obviousness, and Lisbon's dreams and all, it just felt like misdirection, but now, "2 years later," HAFFNER would be welcome.  He fits the description more than anyone; explains why Lisbon was spared, and who better to bug the CBI?  Sometimes though, I think he's just an ordinary guy whose main interest is really just to bang Lisbon.


9:  M. KIRKLAND:  he either served the purpose for why B. Kirkland was sculking around; or he's got a bigger part yet to be revealed.


I will always love a redheaded woman for RJ [because those were the clues] but I'd be happy with:


1.  Kirkland Twin, 2.  Haffner/Stiles, 3.  Patridge/Jane twist  or how about  4.  More info about McRJ's history!  
Hopefully, Heller will stop underwhelming us.

1) I never really thought the ring wearing person sipping tea with Rosalind Harker was the same person hacking up bodies with a linoleum cutter, but I suppose it's possible.  

2) I also never thought of Sheriff McAllister as the tea drinking type either.  

3) I don't remember seeing ANYTHING that would have provided a counterpoint to McAllister's hillbilly personality:

like say a copy of Moby Dick in his cop car LOL

or perhaps some classical music on the radio while he was shooting bucks out his cop car window LOL  

or maybe McAllister in a nice 3 piece suit at the church for his face off with Jane at the end!  LOL  [You'd think he would have dressed for the occasion].

4) It would be interesting to see a list of RJ attributes compared against the traits of McAllister -- though I already know that you couldn't cross reference anything, except for cowboy boots and ability to make a high pitched voice.  LOL

5) Gosh, we never even got to see where McAllister was living.  Being a town's sheriff [and not JUST a serial killer and leader of a huge mafia organization controlling the lives of THOUSANDS], he'd have a home address somewhere, right?  LOL  Unless he lived in his cop car at the station.  

6) It's convenient that McAllister never seemed to have a home because then Jane didn't ever have to go there, and thus the writers didn't have to worry about pulling the reveal out of their asses.  Just make everyone drive to Jane's 10 hours away house like it's around the corner!

7) Why didn't Jane guess McAllister years ago?  Somehow he saw through EVERYONE else for a decade, AND even knew Fisher and Abbot's favorite childhood toys, but he couldn't guess McAllister until the bomb gag? 

OH, I KNOW, HELLER & CO. DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR "SILLY" QUESTIONS LIKE THESE!

1. Haibach tried to cut off Jane's finger because Bob Kirkland did it to him

2. Red John instructed Lorelei to cut of Jane's finger prior to this

Could it be that particular RJ on that particular day was Michael Kirkland?  Not hard to figure out where the Kirkland twins might have picked up this bad habit up considering their upbringing

3.  Mikey K.  could easily have been a youth at the barn who got straightened out [alcoholism] through Visualize and RJ

--- only problem is that while we know RJ's smiley face is on the Visualize barn -- Heller didn't bother to give us the connection between McAllister and Visualize, but then I guess that's not SURPRISING considering there are more holes in the Red John story than in a extra large sized colander 

Please Heller, take us somewhere we've been before and EXPLAIN why the F you took us there in the first place!!